Lovely Alone
by planet p
Summary: A Stargate SG-1 spin-off, centered around Janet for the first chapter.


**Lovely Alone** by planet p

**Disclaimer** I don't own _Stargate: SG-1_ or_ Stargate: Atlantis_ or any of their characters.

* * *

_Stargate Arena_

One fan's spin-off of MGM's _Stargate SG-1_

In which we are taken to an alternate universe

Where Charles Kawalsky and Janet Fraser are alive

'Lovely Alone' is the first episode in this spin-off

* * *

_Prologue_

Charles Kawalsky and Janet Fraser had met at one of those charity dinners – this one had been for a group which advocated against gun violence – and when they got talking, they'd been seated at tables next to each other, Janet had found that the evening wasn't as bad as she'd thought it would be.

Obviously, with the amount of violence kids watched on television and were exposed to in the media daily, and the lack of discussion that went on in schools, homes and after-school activities about violence and guns, it was hardly going to do much, except, of course, cost a lot of money.

The money was supposed to go to the foundation, but Janet wasn't so sure that that would do much anyway. If they decided to pop by some schools with an anti-violence/anti-guns message, and the next day, or next week, the school had some religious group around promising that the most astute kids'd get a go on the video game later, one in which one character kickboxed the other character into oblivion, it was hardly going to leave a lasting impression.

But meeting Charlie left an impression on Janet that night; they were married five months later.

Then, a month after that, Charlie was declared MIA, and Janet got her first look at what Charlie had been doing – where he'd been working – when he'd gone missing.

The sense of hope she'd tenuously maintain deflated; she couldn't look at travel between stars, solar systems, planets, between worlds, as the 'great' achievement that it was for humanity, because her husband was out there, alone, except for the hostile alien enemy inhabiting his body, and she could not just whiz through the Gate and go to him, and rescue him.

Earth was her home, and Charlie's home too, and he was out there, so far away from home, and she didn't even know if he was still alive.

Jackson's wife, too, she'd heard.

Here was this great piece of technology, artefact from Africa, and it wasn't even of Earth origin, it had been built by aliens, and they were just… sending people through it, and marvelling at how wonderful it was, but it was her job to make it alright when they came back sick or battered, or dying.

It was absurd, but she couldn't say so, because then she'd never see Charlie again. She'd wait and wait, for years, and she'd never see him again.

She'd never get to tell him that he was going to be a father, that they were going to be parents.

* * *

_Present Day_

Basil was born in the spring, with the trees in full bloom outside his mother's hospital room window.

Janet hadn't known what to name him, Charlie's family had not attended the wedding, and, in honesty, they'd never talked about his family, or his origins. She hadn't known if the surname she'd taken when they'd married had been from a Russian father, or anything like that. Charlie had promised that they'd talk about it, one day, soon, but that had been before his disappearance.

So she'd named their boy Basil, because she'd liked the name, and the pot of herbs Charlie had bought her for their first 'real' date after the charity dinner, rather than the flowers she'd been expecting.

Janet watered that pot of basil everyday, and prayed that Charlie would come back to Basil and her some day.

She took time off work for the first few months, visiting a mother's group with little baby Basil, and met a couple of women who became friends: Ugolina and Zabrina. Ugolina had moved to Germany as a girl from Africa, and had been saddened by the way some people in America didn't like her just because of her skin colouring. Zabrina was from Finland, and pale as the Queen of Aces in a deck of playing cards, with a mermaid's tail of long, flowing blonde hair.

Ugolina was mother to twin girls, Maeve and Tenderness. She admitted she'd been expecting a boy and a girl, so she'd had no name ready for the second born when it had transpired that she was a girl, apart from Egberta, which she'd thought the girl would certainly grow to detest, so it'd been Tenderness. Zabrina had named her boy Sigfrido because his father was Italian, and the name had reminded her of Frodo, her favourite character from literature.

Janet had smiled at their stories, but she'd not been ready to tell her own, so she told them that Basil was much better than Herb or Sage; she was a vegetarian, and she did not think you could name a child Pumpkin or Potato.

Ugolina had laughed, as she had at all of their stories, and smiled at the next member of their group whose turn it was to 'share.'

That had been two months ago; now Janet was back at work, Basil was in day care, and she felt so horrible for abandoning the only piece of Charlie that she had left, for abandoning their child – her child – in such a way, and at all, but she just needed to be at work, she just couldn't think, so she had to work instead.

She needed to be there if Charlie came home.

* * *

Ugolina, as it turned out, was also a member of the SGC, and worked under the command of Thewlis on SG-3.

Stunned to see one of her friends dressed up in military gear, and wounded, lying in the Gateroom, Janet quickly came to the realisation that she was where she was supposed to be, and that she needed to help – fast.

In the infirmary, later, Ugolina quizzed her as to whether she'd detected a spark between Colonel Thewlis and herself, a line of questioning which Janet put down to a combination of shock and painkillers.

For a joke, Janet asked, "Am I going to be bumping into Zabrina, too?"

"Shouldn't think so, Janey," Ugolina responded animatedly, despite the medication she'd been dosed with for the surgery earlier. "She's with Dr. Lee. Her Italian guy… to boost her glam girl image… _fictitious_! I'll bet the father's that Lee; I'll bet they read _Lord of the Rings_ together when they're alone…" She scrunched up her face and laughed, imagining the places they might have read _Lord of the Rings_.

"She's a scientist?"

"Whiz programmer," Ugolina told her. "She can program the 'eek' out of 'geek' and wham in the 'lam' in 'glam'!" She laughed, and waved a hand to her face. "I can't feel my arm, is that okay?"

Janet nodded; it was okay. "We had to give you a local anaesthetic to remove the shrapnel from your arm during surgery," she explained professionally.

"And that explains why my arm looks like I'm Lady Hulk, too?"

Janet nodded.

Ugolina nodded, and her eyes closed slowly. "I think I'm just going to close my eyes now; I'm a bit tired, that was some run back to the Gate."

"Alright," Janet agreed. "I'm sure it was, Ugolina."

* * *

Janet took her lunch in the Mess Hall that day, rather than in her office as she usually did, and bumped into Zabrina and Bill Lee, sitting together at a table eating their own lunches, and discussing something called _Animorphs_.

When Zabrina saw her, she waved her over energetically, and Janet picked up her feet and trudged over to join them at the table they'd taken.

The conversation about _Animorphs_ was dropped, and Zabrina asked how Ugolina was faring, whilst Bill picked at the salad Zabrina had forced on him.

Zabrina told her about a fever Frido had come down with, which had required her to drive him into the Emergency Room of her local hospital at 4 A.M. that morning – Bill stopped picking at his salad, and stared at a large glob of tomato – and finished that Sigfrido was fine now, and out of hospital. She was very relieved.

"Yes, I'm sure," Bill muttered to his piece of tomato in a lowered voice, verging on ironical.

Zabrina's head snapped up and her chin whipped around so that her clear blue eyes settled upon his face in an unwavering stare.

"I… ah, you heard that?"

Zabrina's face darkened; she'd heard that!

"You… certainly have excellent hearing," Bill commented.

"Why wouldn't I?" Zabrina demanded, overly defensive.

"No, no reason," Bill responded quickly.

Janet looked between them, wondering if what Ugolina had told her was true.

"If you would have given me your number-!" Zabrina ranted hotly.

"You don't have his number?" Janet interrupted, her eyes snapping to Zabrina's fuming face.

Zabrina glowered at Bill with a death glare. "He doesn't want me ringing him up 'night and day'!" she gritted.

Bill shook his head, his expression clearly indicating that, in his opinion, whatever he'd said to Zabrina had been misconstrued, and Zabrina was mistaken. "Look, why don't you start by lowering your voice, Sabrina."

"_Za_-brina!" Zabrina hollered. "My name is Zabrina, you halfwit!"

"Half of what?" Bill demanded hotly, jumping to his feet.

Zabrina mimicked his action, leaping to her feet in response. "You're a halfwit!" she bellowed across the table.

"Maybe it's best," Janet interrupted calmly. "That you don't swap numbers, I mean."

"Rubbish!" Zabrina shouted.

"Why ever not?" Bill asked loudly.

Janet sighed, resigned. "Just let me finish my lunch first, alright?" she told them, taking a bit out of her sandwich.

"Janet, it's good to see you out of the Infirmary!" Sam Carter announced, bounding across the hall to her side with quick strides.

At the sound of Sam's voice, Zabrina and Bill retook their seats on cue, preoccupying themselves quickly with their respective lunches.

Sam grinned, moving her weight from one foot to the other. "How is the Captain?"

"Fighting fit," Janet told her, looking up into her face. "Would you care to join us, Samantha?"

Sam fought back a cringe, and shifted her weight between her feet hastily. "Ah, no, I'm actually taking lunch with Daniel; I'm sorry… Ah, another time maybe?"

Janet smiled and gave a decisive nod. "Another time," she replied.

Sam nodded and scooted off, toward the table at which her fellow team members, Daniel Jackson, Teal'c and Jack O'Neill sat; Daniel and O'Neill engrossed in conversation.

Zabrina sniggered, and looked up from her chicken salad.

"Ah, Janet, Carter doesn't really go by-"

"It's Sam," Zabrina interrupted Bill's hesitant explanation.

Bill nodded as though Zabrina hadn't spoken, though he was agreeing with her. "N-not Samantha, just Sam."

Janet looked down at her sandwich, dismayed, and grimaced. "I'll certainly note that for future use," she told them, and took another bite out of her sandwich; the good thing was, they'd stopped arguing.

* * *

Sitting on the concrete step at the back of her house, as cool afternoon winds spiralled about her legs, she listened to the Beethoven drifting out of Basil's nursery into the garden, and twisted the gold ring on the fourth digit of her left hand.

She missed Charlie.


End file.
